CONTROL FREAK !

Do all females feel like they need to be in control or is it just Eve.

She wants to have a 50th Birthday party - for herself! She asked me and a friend of hers to plan this party; however, Eve sent us the list of people she wants, invitation, told us where to have the party, what kind of food and drinks or lack of drinks! Non-alcoholic - which really is ok because she has many alcoholic friends, including her husband....
Now she tells me she wants to check over the evite before I send it...





CAN YOU SAY CONTROL FREAK! even her friend thinks so (email: she wants us to organize and do all the work, but she still has to be in control!!) But wait a minute.....she is doing this "control" becuase it really isn't "her" it's "GOD" working through EVE.
Whatever! I'll have the party like a good little soldier and be out of town 5 days later!

EVE - what a Bitch!!

Where did she come from - oh yeah...Bio-M! Why can't she just take care of her own FUCKED UP life...stop controlling everyone around her. REALLY!
I (and Kip) tried to help nephew with his laptop - she thinks I am trying to steal it? keep it? if Eve and loser husband weren't so cheap, they would have had it set up before leaving the store instead of handing it to their son in a box....when they purchased this laptop, there were rebates - if I had not taken care of these forms, receipts, mails...she would not have received the rebate check!
I moved for employment purposes - but I feel like I owe her my life! as she reminds me in subtle ways; and her need to "pay" back the time I helped her. I don't help people because I want to be "paid" back in any form.
Due to my living arrangements, she and loser blame me for his problem relationship with his mother - we agreed not to talk about the house; they agreed not to ask questions about us living in house; but she (they) can't stop themselves! she has to control every situation.
I wonder when I'll tell her were moving north!!!

Scrooge Has Nothing on Me

Tis the season to be miserable.

Who was the moron that decided to put three major holidays within 4 weeks of one another? Don't they know we need time to recover in between? Don't they know it is too much family for anyone to take? Don't they know that our wallets are aching? What on earth were they thinking???

I hate - H.A.T.E. - this time of year. The days get shorter and daylight fades. It gets cold and dreary. The end of year pressures build at work. And, to top it all off, the peer and family pressures are, well, pressuring for celebration, gifts, travel, commitments, etc.

I used to love the holidays. And I used to love to give gifts and celebrate with family. But now it always seems so tough. I wish I was organized enough to buy a gift when I see it and am inspired and put it away for the holidays. Instead, I do a 1 or 2-day marathon shop and end up buying stuff, just to buy stuff. I don't know if the gift I get is wanted or needed, and lately I've been copping out by getting gift certificates or sending checks. I feel like I'm buying the holiday off.

Decorating my house is another sore subject. The idea of spending a weekend climbing up on my roof and gutters to attach lights that will have to come down a month later (when it is even colder and darker out) seems ludicrous. And the tree thing? I used to love the tree. Now it seems like such an effort, and I need to move furniture around, sweep up needles, unpack ornaments, and then undo it all again a few short days later. I mean, really, who has the energy?

I'm trying to remember when the holiday season became more of an obligation than a joy. I guess it happens right after you stop being a kid and have to be an adult. As a kid it's the time when you get presents (but don't have to give them), you stay up late and eat fattening foods (but aren't worried about being tired or fat), you go to many parties (but never have to figure out which ones or how to gracefully refuse that pressing invitation to great-aunt what's her face).

I started getting pressure in August from Mom about where we would be for holidays, what was the menu for Thanksgiving, could we take time off around Christmas, etc. etc. etc. My in-laws (thank god) are much more low-key and just say, "We'll see you when..." which is a relief, but also puts the onus back on us to plan something each time as well. Christmas and New Years mid-week is always an extra pain in the neck as well - Technically we only have the Thursday off - so that means we have to plan - do we take off Monday to Wednesday and go back to work on Friday? Take Friday and have to travel on Christmas and New Year's Eve? Family will be in town before Christmas but not after - so if you want to see them this is the time, but since you have to take a week off in January for your niece's Bat Mitzvah, taking extra time at holidays is a problem...and on and on and on.

I wish I could garner up the emotional wherewithal to love this holiday season again and be all "It's a wonderful life" but I just haven't got it in me anymore. I really want to be a turtle and pull all my limbs and my head into the shell until it's all over.

So if you come by my place between Thanksgiving and New Years, rest assured, you will be warmly greeted and will enjoy wonderful company, and good food and drink (which we have year round!), but don't count on a kick-ass gift (and don't give me one, I still have most of them from last year unused and unspent), lights, a tree, or mistletoe.

So. Bah Humbug and stuff.

With Love and Little Malice,
W-Sister

Shaking with Anger

I have been literally shaking with anger today. And not at my family. At my job.

If I post this on my usual blog space, however, Mom will read it and will go ballistic on her advice to me about my job. So this is a little about my family after all.

This morning - my value was questionned. Now, I've had a lot of frustration over the years with little things here at my place of work, but the one thing I always had was the feeling that my efforts were valued. But now, in this world of budget cuts and finger pointing, I actually had an executive at my company questioning where I was charging my time and what was the purpose of my activities. First of all, I don't report to him. Secondly, my budget does not roll up to him. Thirdly, are you FUCKING KIDDING ME??? Take care of your own world first Dude, then you can teach me best practices on budget management and time efficiency. But until then, just STAY THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY.

I actually typed my response to his email with a line that said, "If you want me to quit to save the company money, just tell me." But I thought better of it and deleted it before hitting send. I will however, take the next opportunity I have to see him and talk to him face-to-face.

Until then, I'll keep stewing on this one. And maybe I'll work a little less UNPAID overtime for the next few weeks. Since my efforts are not really of value anyway.

Hemorrhoids, Polyps and Scopes, Oh My

At the risk of sharing too much information, let me talk a little shit. Or at least shit chute.

Several weeks ago I made Kip take me to the ER at midnight. Because I was bleeding from my ass. Now everyone has had a little spot here or there. You know, too much fibre, too wide a load, etc. (told you this would be a bit much info!). But this time, it wasn't really stopping. It wasn't gushing, but it was there and in more quantity than was comfortable. So we went.

And the humiliation was JUST beginning.

I got a doctor pretty quickly. But, they were short on nurses. So he asked Kip to stay in the room while he conducted a....ahem...rectal exam. Wow. How do you look sexy for your man after this one? Plus? The doctor decided it was a good idea to after the...ahem...rectal exam...hold up the gloved finger proudly and say, "Look, brown".

Oh My Holy God.

Anyway, turns out I have like a small hemorrhoid or something and it was irritated and I got a small tear in it. No biggie. But I've spent over 40 years trying to ignore the more distasteful things about the human body...to be exact, the more distasteful things about MY human body, and in one night it all came crashing down.

Mom recently had some bleeding of her own, and when they scoped her they decided to remove a polyp which tested out as cancerous. They calmly reported they got it all, no need to worry, but of course, anyone (especially Mom) would worry. She contacted a friend who has had full blown colon cancer who relayed to her that she had her 4 kids go for colonoscopies and ALL of them had something suspicious or dangerous in their findings.

Today I got four emails from Mom. Count them. F.O.U.R.
All about how I must go get a colonoscopy. And isn't it great the weather will be nice this weekend. And I should get a colonoscopy. And how she is looking forward to Thanksgiving. And I should get a colonoscopy. And how she bought a cute top. And I should get a colonoscopy. Not that she is trying to run my life. But I should get a colonoscopy - and so should Kip.

So. I guess I know my next stop.

Because the emails will NOT stop.

Colonoscopy here I come.

Hopefully the worst thing I'll hear is "Look, brown."

With Love and Little Malice,
W-Sister

Real.Life.Drama.

Don't you just love A&E's tagline? Well, J-Sister and I were watching us some tv together this week - a rarity - since we live in different time zones normally - and each was wondering about the other's choices.

1. VP Debates. We agreed this one was a must-see. But I admit to spending a lot of time with my hands over my eyes, my ears, my lips. Trying not to see Palin wink at me, trying not to hear her give totally inappropriate energy answers to economy questions, and trying to stop myself from screaming over the top of the whole thing, "How can ANYONE actually consider voting for her ticket???" J-Sister in turn was squirming in her seat because she hates to watch them fight, and do their own squirming around the questions. "This, " she said, "is why I never know who to vote for." At that moment Brooklyn Boy and I almost jumped on top of her to scream - YOU VOTE FOR OBAMA!!!!

2. My favorite Bravo shows - Project Runway and Top Design. J-Sister must have really questioned my judgment here. In fact, she did. She said at least 4 times, "I can't believe you watch this shit!" She changed her tune however when she was in Manhattan and actually saw someone with a Mood bag in Bryant Park. This little brush with real.life.drama may have converted her.

3. What Happens in Vegas - on pay per view. J-Sister's pick. I seconded - thinking it was a harmless chick flick - probably not great - but perfect for a light night's distraction. The truth? DO NOT RENT THIS MOVIE. Not even Ashton Kutscher's hotness can save this one. A.W.F.U.L.

With love and little malice,
W-Sister